farah’s corner

19th June…

what a date…
to think that i had to stayback till 4am by myself at the office simply
because i had to prepare the documents needed to be tabled at the
meeting…

actually i had planned to stay till subuh like previously but however…. there are some ‘disturbances’ that made me ‘chiaow’!

i wasn’t sleeping as i continued working at home using a more
sophisticated notebook which will not hang after a certain duration of
usage…

i was like dreaming… is 19th really happening? with me all alone?
with that pakcik>?? rasa cam i can hardly believe what’s going on..

but at least i got some help from my good friend at EPU who’s a PTD
supporting me. Thanks cik kak… as usual… the nature of meeting…
without clear decisions… and all talks… but request more things 2
be done by the secretariat… (bertambahla keje aku nampaknya)

so… the meeting had nothing to resolve but more things to be solved…
so for the next meeting:

• redo paper/proposal for the Dialogue
• must check with all the players (all!!) of all the troubles faced
• consult CWG (what a challenge)
• prepare ABIO (what a challenge)
• checkout other companies that applied TechnoFund

Banyaknya……
And to do them by myself.. what a task
that night i recieved an invitation to another seminar by MOSTI which
my dear boss asked me to go so no choice there… the seminar will be
on 21-22nd June…

i ended up being sick the following day (20th June) … fever but i took emergency leave…
i planned to go to clinic but there are things happened so aku peram la sakit aku tu lama sikit. one day wasted…. =>so there goes my plan to ambush PTPTN…

when can i push this PTPTN agenda of mine… ??
i attended the first day of seminar (21th June) with my other
colleagues but i find it so ‘interesting’ till i nearly banged my head
to the table sebab i accidentally slept…
so my officemate and i went back early to the office and stayed there
and do some work in my office rather than wasting my time
there..doozing off…  there at the office i was asking around for
directions to go to PTPTN…

so i planned to go to PTPTN on friday morning then i’ll resume the seminar after that… all well-planned
but alas!!!
since my fever (sickness) was not attended the other day, so i ended up
being really sick till i cant move and do anything… so that friday is
wasted….
aduuuusss….

tension tension…

well…

it’s almost 10pm and i’m still at the office- sunday…
well not that i wanna complain bout that but it’s just that now instead
of having pierre andre with me together with the si pendek the nana
jarum and our dear associate, i end up working alone..

it’s all about the late responses…
damn it!! and i’m the mangsa keadaan….

u top guns delay the responses but kami the ikan bilis will pee in our
pants (like i always wear em)…. pee out of panic and perhaps too
tired, not being frightened or so… and vomit blood too..

i have so many things to consider now…

• i have to check with the hotel (equatorial) for the price;when this should be done by some secretary or admin personnel…
• have a chat with my ex-supervisor in ukm…
• my fading health (it’s coming back)
• my ptptn issues (i’m about to kena saman, damn!!! why now….??)
• wait for responses from my top guns…

adus….
just now i have to sms my senior vice president to alarm him bout my
impending work. the meeting is this tuesday, less than 2 days!!! all he
replied was… "i havent seen the papers yet"

should i panic?
i’m already panicking in silent for my ptptn issues and i cant go there
and have a good yell at the officers yet as i cant afford 2 leave the
office at the critical hours. neither can i call from the office
because i cant let anybody hear me screaming at some lazy officers!
oh damn nobody or bosses can stop me from going there (PTPTN) this wednesday, hell yeah!

somehow how i do feel i’m about to become a scape goat this tuesday…
why must i learn things the hard way!!!

i’ll panic tomorrow…
now i wanna stop blogging, bring back my work and stay up for nothing…
sebab i’ve done my part but the response is damn slow!
so, i’ll go back sehelai sepinggang, not gonna bring back anything!!
and have a nice sleep…

angin, angin dan angin…

it seems yesterday i was feeling bloated the whole day… sampai my
boss tegur, nape berbungkus2  yesterday…. the thing is, believe it
or not, despite of being ‘extra small hehe’, i’m so prone to gastric
or known as epigastritis (baru
tadi aku tau)…. kononnya bila aku bungkus badan haku dgn shawl yg
usually wrap my chair, tu kononnya all the unwanted mass of gassas akan
ternyah kuar le… obviously tak effective langsung. nampak cam buah
nangka kena balut ada la… huhu

i’m so fond of massaging the pregnant mothers around me in the office
which are known to be bloated as well (but not just by mass of gasses).
agaknya angin2 depa dah tertransfer kat aku kot…. yeah rite…
yesterday i decided to go back early…

so sempatla aku tgk kawasan  rumah aku di waktu siang during weekdays
while driving back dr office.. sampai2 tu ada neighbour tegur, agaknya
tak penah kenal before this… maklumla, i usually balik rumah time the
neighbourhood dah berlayar far2 away to dreamland… and during
weekends i’ll end up in keramat kl.

sempatla solat maghrib kat rumah… usually subuh je kat rumah,
selebihnya i’ll perform kat office… pathetic isnt it? but i like it…

but time nak solat maghrib tu i somehow feel really sick… nampaknya
the collective mass of gass in my tummy dah mula mengganas… man…
this is really a bad sign… i end up sleeping right after that. but
however, angin ni tak bagi aku dok aman so terjagalah aku di tgh2 pagi
at nearly 4am… (ye ke, rashid, kak farah sms u what time?)(thank
Allah actually or else terlepas ‘Isya)…

well i cant sleep till 7++am… and rasa nak muntah2 pon ade… well…
it’s the gastric attack… i tried hell hard to ctrl myself till my
housemates left for work at around 7:35am then i went to the toilet and
threw-up as much as i can. since yesterday i just ate lunch and nothing
else so not much of help can vomitting do except causing much pain to
my throat and diaphragm.

so the vomitting session lasted for more than half an hour and then
before i knew it i’m already on the bed, smsing kak nira that i’m on
emergency leave (thought that i’m too weak to even seek 4 medical
help)…

however, there are a few calls which remained unentertained and smses
that i received from EPU especially which means i still need to go to
work. damn i’m too weak… however, perhaps Allah The Almighty listens
and gave me strength so by 4pm i’m able to stand and then to slowly
walk around. Thus later i drop by to clinic… and listen to another
lecture from the dr. i’m her regular patient and it seems i’m always
down with gastric.

it’s funny that i’m always haunted with health
problems, earlier in my life feel like dying with asthma till it really
did give severe impact on my studies but thank Allah, since i start
working, i barely get asthma attack although the pressure i’m getting
at work can be really tuff at times…however, dr adviced me to get some crackers and CHOCOLATES in my stock since i have the habit of skipping my main meals. listen that? chocolates
huhuhu… i’ll endeavor that.. so since 6pm tadi i’m at the office
attending to my work and sought some advice from the kind pierre
andre… till now… but of course i’m blogging also hehe…

with all my medications here on the table, nothing to fear. that’s all,
i’m actually amending pierre andre’s proposal, so some idea came up now so gotta
get back 2 work ok…

2b continued…

am i in potential trouble or what..??

since last week i was traveling so much that i can barely sleep at
night as to think so much bout my hectic schedule so as the result i
bantai tido dgn jayanya during weekend till my keramat auntie called up
to ask why am i missing (usually i ‘balik’ keramat during weekend
instead of staying put in putrajaya).

i had a wedding to attend on sunday so my napping (can u call that nap)
is being interrupted. and i went out from house at 11++am (tu pun
lambat, siap kena marah lagik huhu). we convoyed to the wedding which
was in shah alam and arrived at 1pm (siap sesat lagi)… so after some
eating and photographing so we took off.

so instead of going back home, cant explain why i head straight 2 the
office and went up and do some work while eating a huge bar of cadbury
and swallowing a huge mug of vanilla coke down my throat (i treat my
office like my 2nd home, kept lots of stuff in da office)…

while i was typing some very important report (it was about the meeting
i attended last friday) worth 4 to 5 pages, tetiba my laptop yg takleh
dibawak ke majlis tu ter’hang’ pulak… actually i was trying to do the
report on friday lagi but all i can come up with was a half page’s
nonsense. so finally bila dah go as far 5 pages and suddenly hang and
kena restart and then to my disappointment then damn windows DIDNT SAVE THE FREAKING CHANGES!!!! it was back to the half page nonsense! i was in the office till almost 6 doing that just to end up with NOTHING!!!

since i got fed-up so after i performed my Asar(balasan solat
lambat kot), i head to Alamanda pulak (no mood to go home yet). since
i’m a tender and very polite driver, i end up with one of my wheel cap
gone missing(tercabut tgh2 jalan kot..) so niat di hati want 2 have an
emergency cap to replace that, else it’ll look very ugly. although
feeling misrably tired, but i carried a heavy box of clothes hanger
(not the plastic hanger tu, ni yg metal and must be assembled) in my
right hand and the wheel cap in the other.

when the casher scanned the wheel-cap, to my surprise, it wasnt kancil
cap, but wira’s!! i end up paying for the hanger. since the box is too
big so no plastic bag is provided and aku kena jinjing all the way,
but i need the freaking cap. i have 2 walk all the way down to keep
that hanger at carrefour’s counter downstairs (the counter was only
atthat level, what a nuisance) and go up again just 2 get the freaking
cap.

there find that there 2 caps looking smaller than the rest but both
dont have code bars on it. when i attended 2 one salesgirl nearby, she
just simply give up and say sorry madam i’m not from this department
and i dont know how 2 help u and just left!… aku dah la letih, tak
sempat rest, laptop buat perangai and now i’m facing a very lazy
salesgirl yg takdak initiative to help…
what kind of staff carrefour has working here? konon buat reality to finbg hi class manager but the salesperson sumer cam setan.

so boldly i just brought the empty cap to same counter earlier
she told me, "madam, yg ni takde barcode"
i replied,"i know, there’s another one, but also without barcode"
she asked,"kat tempat Puan ambil ni ade kan card yg ada barcode die kan…?" and she paused, expecting something
i replied hastily," ada, so?" i stared at her like telling her dont u dare tell me to go back and take that card!!
as though my telepathic waved reached her mind, she said," madam, can u please wait while i get the card?"
"sure.." haha i won

then i went and had my maghrib prayer (tu balasan solat lambat lagi
kot) went and bought kfc and finally balik rumah…. i was so tired but
i ended up sleeping at nearly 1am and had very irritating migrain tadi
pagi.

half day for me today… keje banyak
keje…. which reminds me of…

….this coming 19th is the postponed JKP meeting and i’m still asking myself, do i have anything up my sleeves to work on?

what i know…

• the proposal; still not firmed, must wait 4 the management decision
• the matters to be presented, but what?
   
• firming up the agenda, must wait 4 EPU… adusss
• …..????

now that i’m all alone, so i have to think everything by myself so… i feel so blank.
despite of having so much to report and a lot of things have been going on lately but i dont know exactly where 2 start…

thinking of working at the comfort of my home so that i feel more relaxed…
and i still didnt put the wheel cap yet,
damn…

hmmm….

this week i’m hardly at the office… earlier this week i helped MOSTI
in some biotech seminars they put up, then TPM (Technology Park
Malaysia) invited me to one of their molecular seminars. then, for 2
days i’ve been in KLCC for SMIDEX gathering infos and building
connections. finally on friday i had to go down 2 kl to represent my
Vice-President in some very important meeting….

it has been 7 months working in where i am now and i must say a
lot  have i learnt ever since then… believe it or not, now I’m very
much intact with the industry which means i should be BUSINESS-DRIVEN also.. listen to that, business…

which reminds me…
as far as i could remember, business is
something i’m really not fond of… i always embed in my mind and
my-ever so bloating stomach that i’m not good with people and cant
convince people… i can still recall how ’semak perut’ i will become
each year during Canteen Day in my younger years… i was a fierce
debater b ack then but in contradict to that i’m really a bashful
person huhu… (surprised?) in the debating world years back, i can
construct very convincing sentences, but then when it comes to social
skills, as in convincing people to do this and that, for me it’s like
forcing and i really dont like it, as much as i dont like being pushed
and forced.

during my early years in varsity (i undergone a special bachelor’s
degree program that cost me 5.5 years unlike normal degree which can
graduate after 3 years haha aka extended version due to absurd health
problems ) there was a lot of these multi-level marketing nonsense
going about. again i feel so semak-perut again each time i come across
buddies who are trying to earn the extra ringgit by expanding their
downliners… luxorla, taisho etc… some even approached me for
insurance-God forbid!! all of these are also special purpose
vehicles…. but for different reasons… each time i have 2 explain
that i’m not into this, pity them sometimes, i can just see how
passionate they were when telling me how much money i can make by
joining the team with those shines in their eyes but i just coldly put
a stop to them.. i used 2 be very loud in varsity so, it’s difficult 2
convince them that i’m not good at this… but then, finally they
understood..

that was before. however the bashfulness is still very much in me in spite of being so damn talkative at times now.

however, being involved in societies and debates and elocutions really
does help to build up ur self-esteem and confidence level so high that
perhaps there are times when u feel like u can coax ur parents into
buying a very expensive item 4 ya or letting u go out with ur friends
on a vacations far2 away from home… so such activities can be assumed
as special purpose vehicles…

never have i thought by indulging into the researchers’ world, i
accidentally fell into the trap of being the business nerd who’s always
looking into establishing networks and distributing as well as
collecting others’ business cards… yeap, that’s me, one of them…

never thought i would be like this… so…. i begin to reminisce all
my escapisms ever since in school…. in the end… i’m one of them,
moving the freaking ’special purpose vehicle’….
my indulgence is in the real corporate world not the ‘hot-hot chicken
shit’ multilevel marketing… and of course, in the real business
world, SPV simply means an entity, a company being
incorporated/established for a specific reason…

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh……
must brush up my talking skills…. i’ve been so silent for these past
few months…. certainly, my talking skills just got rotten up. need 2
do something on that…

aduss…..

hmmm….

this week i’m hardly at the office… earlier this week i helped MOSTI
in some biotech seminars they put up, then TPM (Technology Park
Malaysia) invited me to one of their molecular seminars. then, for 2
days i’ve been in KLCC for SMIDEX gathering infos and building
connections. finally on friday i had to go down 2 kl to represent my
Vice-President in some very important meeting….

it has been 7 months working in where i am now and i must say a
lot  have i learnt ever since then… believe it or not, now I’m very
much intact with the industry which means i should be BUSINESS-DRIVEN also.. listen to that, business…

which reminds me…
as far as i could remember, business is
something i’m really not fond of… i always embed in my mind and
my-ever so bloating stomach that i’m not good with people and cant
convince people… i can still recall how ’semak perut’ i will become
each year during Canteen Day in my younger years… i was a fierce
debater b ack then but in contradict to that i’m really a bashful
person huhu… (surprised?) in the debating world years back, i can
construct very convincing sentences, but then when it comes to social
skills, as in convincing people to do this and that, for me it’s like
forcing and i really dont like it, as much as i dont like being pushed
and forced.

during my early years in varsity (i undergone a special bachelor’s
degree program that cost me 5.5 years unlike normal degree which can
graduate after 3 years haha aka extended version due to absurd health
problems ) there was a lot of these multi-level marketing nonsense
going about. again i feel so semak-perut again each time i come across
buddies who are trying to earn the extra ringgit by expanding their
downliners… luxorla, taisho etc… some even approached me for
insurance-God forbid!! all of these are also special purpose
vehicles…. but for different reasons… each time i have 2 explain
that i’m not into this, pity them sometimes, i can just see how
passionate they were when telling me how much money i can make by
joining the team with those shines in their eyes but i just coldly put
a stop to them.. i used 2 be very loud in varsity so, it’s difficult 2
convince them that i’m not good at this… but then, finally they
understood..

that was before. however the bashfulness is still very much in me in spite of being so damn talkative at times now.

however, being involved in societies and debates and elocutions really
does help to build up ur self-esteem and confidence level so high that
perhaps there are times when u feel like u can coax ur parents into
buying a very expensive item 4 ya or letting u go out with ur friends
on a vacations far2 away from home… so such activities can be assumed
as special purpose vehicles…

never have i thought by indulging into the researchers’ world, i
accidentally fell into the trap of being the business nerd who’s always
looking into establishing networks and distributing as well as
collecting others’ business cards… yeap, that’s me, one of them…

never thought i would be like this… so…. i begin to reminisce all
my escapisms ever since in school…. in the end… i’m one of them,
moving the freaking ’special purpose vehicle’….
my indulgence is in the real corporate world not the ‘hot-hot chicken
shit’ multilevel marketing… and of course, in the real business
world, SPV simply means an entity, a company being
incorporated/established for a specific reason…

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh……
must brush up my talking skills…. i’ve been so silent for these past
few months…. certainly, my talking skills just got rotten up. need 2
do something on that…

aduss…..